Mysterious Barricades

The problem with having a good weekend is that it must, despite my attempts to bend space and time by watching a movie I just finished watching, turn into a Monday. The problem with social media is that there is nothing you can do to stop me from telling you all about it. My verbosity, much like a Monday, is inevitable. 

So Ima (contraction for “I’m going to”) tell you what Ima do when I get home. 

There’s leftover Super Bowl food in the fridge. I’m not taking prisoners. I’m the mood for a party in my mouth, and all good parties need a sandwich. I’ll throw some stuffed jalapenos, hot wings, and bacon-wrapped pruned in there. YEAH I SAID BACON-WRAPPED PRUNES! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT! Interestingly enough, while wrapping prunes in crispy bacon is a recipe for surprisingly exotic splendor, the same cannot be said for wrapping bacon around water chestnuts. Water chestnuts just taste like crunchy water anyway, except they make me thirsty. Don’t like water chestnuts. Side note: bacon-wrapped dates.

Typically I would be happy with simply eating these savory party delights with an ice cold Sam Adams, of which there are still two left in the fridge, but I know that there’s something else on the top shelf of that fridge, and it comes in a silver tray. Yep, it’s pie. It’s Oreo pie. It makes me weak at the knees. Not my favorite pie, but I appreciate any dessert that takes two things that taste great and proves that the taste great together. So I think I’ll finish off my meal with a big damn slice of Oreo pie with some Oreos on the side. YEAH I EAT OREOS WITH MY OREO PIE! WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT?

I’ll see you guys when I come out of the coma.